It just take a sentence or a word to kept me thinking. I just can't handle disappointments, making someone sad or angry. The thought of making someone feels more awful than the guilt I am feeling now, can't helped it but to just think... It's all my fault, so the consequences of my fault was getting those words that might makes me feel hurt or feel anything. I just have to treat the guilt as salt and dissolve it. I just can't be that forgiving towards myself than how others can forgive me that easily. 

I just can't achieve all the expectations and not to make any mistakes. I don't like to deal with negative comments/remarks and the bad feeling I get whenever I did something wrong. Normally I just went up using excuses to cover up, to make everything seems that I did not make any mistake. Now it just seems like emotions are in the control. 

" I will be okay before anyone can see me in this state " 

" I always do, till now... "